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'The Big Tripout Report' has been published since January 2002. It is now in its 21st Issue, below you can find all the old stories from the previous issues.

Current Edition >
Issue 20 11-December-2003, New York, USA

Easy Riders
Toby and Sarena Got their motors running, then headed out on the highway, Looking for adventure and whatever came their way. Yeah baby the're gonna make it happen, take the world in a love embrace, fire all their guns at once and explode into space!...

...Like a true natures child, they where born, born to be wild, they can fly so high, they never, wanna die (a-hi).

They donned their leathers (no they didn't), strapped on their helmets (no they didn't), grew their beards (only Sarena did that) and terrorised the States (again only Sarena did that). Toby and Sarena took a 4 day whistle stop tour of Florida Keys and the Everglades on a couple of Harley Davidsons. Toby straddled a Fat Boy (not the first time) Sarena rode a Low Rider. They packed a tent and a tooth brush and hit the open roads. Sarena cruising the Everglades (1,336 kb)... more

Lazy Riders
QUESTION: Why walk when you can Segway?
ANSWER: Probably because you want to get some exercise and not look like a tit!

Only in America! The latest invention and the ultimate in laziness. Obviously being open minded Toby and Sarena gave these contraptions a go, it also looks like a whole load of fun too. Well with a top speed of 12.5 these nifty little muthers are fun. They are actually pretty tiring too and can only take so much weight so are unlikely to make the nation even fatter. Trouble is no matter how much fun they are - at the end of the day you will always look like a tit. Toby masters the Segway (1,335 kb)... more

This time 2 years ago...
...We had trekked up to Everest base camp and raised £1000 for a Kathmandu Orphanage, Traveled across Northern India to end up being very civilised in Goa, raided a pick 'n' mix bar of Singapore and arrived in Sydney and then Melbourne... not much then!

Shrek 2 plot leaked
The follow up to the smash film 'Shrek' has been in production for a while. But up until now the plot to the new film has been kept a closely guarded secret. Thanks to an internal leak we can proudly bring the storyline exclusively to you...

... The story continues straight from the original... Shrek is on his honeymoon with his ogre wife when at night the princess is kidnapped and replaced by an evil ogre who looks just like the princess. The evil ogre then attempts to sell of Shrek's land to a theme park operator and kill off Shrek so that he can not claim his share of the princesses original claim to the kingdom. All this is interspersed with a funny talking donkey called Donkey.

Generally the cast list goes unchanged although the role for the new main cast member 'Evil Ogre' was awarded to Sarena Perry (pictured above). Sarena is famous for her previous typecast roles as an evil ogre... more


Tour of the southern states
Toby and Sarena have been pretty busy this last month taking in some of the hotspots in the southern United States... Chilling in Miami, Camping in the Florida Keys, Air boating around the Everglades, Visiting Mickey and friends at Disney, Partying and ghost hunting in New Orleans, and Living in a Whore House in Cowtown, Texas. All in all having a rootin' tootin ol' time. Time to leave the States now though, as we speak the intrepid duo are heading back south to Costa Rica and hopefully some sun and heat for the Christmas season.


This time last year...
...We where Living and working in Katikati, New Zealand we spent our free time Fishing, Bungee Rocketing, Visiting the Coromandel and Blow Karting! All whilst entertaining various house guests.



Issue 19 10-November-2003, Quito, Ecuador

The Curse of the Incas

Strange things have been happening to Toby and Sarena over the last month. Things they have managed to avoid for the whole 2 years of traveling. The first incident seemed minor enough. They had to change their travel plans for the first time due to riots and strikes in Bolivia. Instead of visiting this high plateau they changed their course and continued up the amazon river through Brazil and to the Tri-Frontier borders of Brazil, Peru and Colombia. The next incident found them stranded in a tiny Peruvian jungle village after their 'tin can' motorboat broke down. All the signs started to point towards preventing the couple from reaching the heart of the Inca civilization in Peru. Battling their way through the Jungle and making it down to Cusco in the Andes only seemed to increase the power of the curse. Sarena was then inflicicted with acute illness the night before they were due start a 4 day Hike to the Inca city of Machu Picchu. She fought bravley to overcome her illness, but then 1 day into the Hike Toby was also inflicted. Being of a weaker constituion than his traveling partner they where forced to turn back. But not forced to quit. Eventually they made it to Machu Picchu (by train) and belived they had beaten the curse...

...Not quite so. 2 days later Toby was struck down again, forcing hospitalistion for a night. Then it was reported that they where the lucky ones as the rest of the group who had treked to Machu Picchu where later discovered - their bones bleaching in the desert sun of Arequipa.

Back in the Northern Hemisphere (if only for a minute)
After 695 action packed days in the southern hemisphere. Toby and Sarena finally cross the equator back to the correct side of the world. Is this a sign of them coming home... Well YES - eventually. Lots more to see yet though as they now prepare to leave South America for new adventures in the central and Northern parts of this great continent...more


Masters of Jungle Survival
Toby and Sarena recently spent 4 hard survival days on the Black River (Rio Negro) in the heart of the Amazon Jungle.

Some of the many survival tips they learned included catching and eating Piranhas, Passifying Alligators, Teasing Tarantulas, Swinging from vines (240 kb), Making insect repellent from the juice of ants, Extracting life saving medicines from the various native trees and plants. But the most important lesson to be learnt - DO NOT GO FOR A PEE AT NIGHT, UNLESS YOU WANT BITES ON YOUR PRIVATES... Sarena couldn't sit down for a week!... more

This time last year...
...We where Living and working in Katikati, New Zealand we spent our free time Off-Roading, Fun-walking, Swooping and zorbing and Milking!


This time 2 years ago...
...We had tested pancakes in Southern China, Hung out in Hong Kong, Made base camp in Kathmandu, Rafted past dead bodies, rode elephants through jungles, pledged support to an orphange and took a long road trip through Tibet.


Issue 18 10-October-2003, Rio De Janeiro, Brazil

Tango in Buenos Aires

Find yourself a nice smoky bar in a cobbled neighbourhood of Buenos Aires and sit down for a show of Tango. It's a must in Buenos Aires and the first port of call for Toby and Sarena on their arrival at this amazing city. ... more

Andes Heights.
Just over the border of Chile and into Argentina sits the highest mountain in the Americas - Aconcagua. Toby couldn't resist a days visit to this region of the Andes which included inca settlements and more hot geysers... more


Colonial Uruguay .
Toby and Sarena only afforded themselves a few days in Uruguay, but they where well rewarded for there effort after discovering the small portuguese settlement of Colonia where they spent a few days being very cosmopolitan and scooting around on the cobbled streets of the old town... more

This time last year...
...We where Living and working in Katikati, New Zealand we spent our free time discovering Mount Manganui, Golf, and Sheep!

Relaxing in Rio
After storming through 3 countries in a month Toby and Sarena used the many attractions of Rio De Janeiro as an excuse to for a rest bite from 24 hour bus journeys.

Staying at Copacabana beach for the first couple of nights they managed to take in the Christ monument, a game of football and find enough time for a bit of people watching on the beach. ...more


Iguazu Falls
One of the Natural wonders of the world and after 2 years of traveling Toby and Sarena can officially declare that Iguazu falls is one of the most impressive sights they have seen so far.

With the added bonus of Monkeys, Toucans and ant eaters this day out on the Argentina / Brazil border is a must. ... more

This time 2 years ago...
...We where traveling through Siberia, Mongolia and China by bus and train, taking in the Great Wall, Forbidden City, Terracotta Warriors, Cute Pandas, and the delightful Yangtze River!!!


Issue 17 13-September-2003, Mendoza, Argentina

Toby & Sarena split!

Its official after 2 years of traveling together. Toby and Sarena have finally agreed on something... They can't stand each other! Sarena 'Evil' Perry in no reasonable words told Toby where to go. Which actually happened to be the driest desert in the world, Atacama, in the North of Chile.

Fortunately for Toby, there is actually some pretty interesting spots in the Atacama desert. Like a dog with his tail between his legs he took his tent and found a solitary little spot in amongst some weeds at a small dusty town called San Pedro. From there he mixed with a myriad of young ladies and took in all the local sites... Flamingos, Salt Lakes, Andean Lakes and villages, fields of Geysers and massive sand dunes.

Sarena meanwhile moped around Santiago, coughing and wheezing and generally having a bad hair day regretted her decision to kick Toby out. After her consistent begging Toby forgave her and returned to Santiago. Although things still look a bit shaky for the future (well until she sorts her hair out!). ... more


2 years on the road.
On the 10th of September Toby and Sarena celebrated there completion of a 2nd year on the road and 2 years of 'The Big Tripout'. As this was such a mammoth event Toby forgave Sarena's previous 'Evilness' and returned to Santiago so that they could begin the celebrations on the 9th with a few drinks amongst fellow travelers staying in La Casa Roja International Backpacking Hostel (plug)... more

Back to school
One of the hardest things Toby and Sarena have had to do since traveling.. Go back to school.

At first it seemed like a good idea - 'Lets go to school and learn spanish' said Toby. But the issues of getting up at 7, walking to school, using your brain, and then spending the afternoon doing homework was all to much for these slack asses. Thank God it was only for a couple of weeks. ...more


'La Casa Roja' aka 'La Bermuda Triangle'
It was totally unexpected, but Toby and Sarena found themselves stuck at a Backpacking Hostel in the heart of Santiago. La Casa Roja. is a beautiful 18th centre house which was recently bought and Refurbished by 'Simon the Aussie'.

There is more to this house than first seems... Just try to leave... it is impossible.

In fact Sarena managed 30 nights straight before managing to escape this place. Some poor buggers though have been trapped for months and presumed lost by relatives and friends... more

Issue 16 16-August-2003, Santiago, Chile

Gary & Sarah proposal
In a splash of romance only reserved for lovey dovey girly books. Local lad Gary Wolfe whisked Sarah Mead off to a remote Fijian island just to propose to her on the golden sands of their own private beach. Feeling rather disgruntled by the whole affair Toby & Sarena seemed very put out that they were not waiting for them when they also arrived on the same island.

'We were expecting a greeting party as we arrived ashore but instead these two 'love birds' decided it would be more appropriate to shun our grand arrival and amuse themselves with their ring swapping antics'

Later in the day Toby & Sarena forgave the couples indiscretion and they all celebrated the news of the engagement that evening with a few rounds of cocktails and Fiji Bitter... more

Congratulations to Gary & Sarah

Jacques Chirac throws party.
Unlike old friends (i.e. Gary & Sarah) The French Premier, Jacques Chirac, celebrated Toby & Sarena's arrival to French Polynesia in style by holding a massive party for them at Tahiti's national stadium. 1000,s turned up to listen to JC address Toby & Sarena and welcome these honourable Brit's to one of the most beautiful places on earth.

'If only he could of splashed out on some decent accommodation for us both. Bloody french, all show and no action' ... more

Emma Gorrell, attacked by vicious wild dogs.
Toby and Sarena where witness to a horrific attack when their new friend Emma Gorrell was savagely ripped from the back of Toby's motorbike by a pack of snarling dogs on one of the most remote islands in the world, Easter Island. The incident left the whole island in shock as Emma was rushed to hospital to receive stitches in her foot (well 1), jabs in her bum, and some sticky tape to cover the hole in her boot. The good news is she is now recovering well in Santiago... more

Paradise Island part 1
Toby & Sarena's introduction to the islands of the South Pacific was Waya Island in Fiji. They headed straight to the highly recommended Octopus resort and pitched camp there for a good solid week of hammock lounging and snorkeling...more

Paradise Island part II
Next stop for the two beach bums was the slightly more expensive (bloody extortionate) French Polynesia. After a weekend on Tahiti Toby & Sarena set up camp on the beautiful Moorea island, where they found themselves swimming with sharks and providing lifts to fellow travelers on the back of their scooter... more

Paradise Island part III
Their final polynesian destination was the mysterious Easter Island (Rapa Nui) with its rugged coastline, blustering winds and sporadic downpours, It wasn't quit what these 2 beach bums had recently become accustomed to. But in actual fact was a welcome relieve from Heat, Mosquito's and inflated prices and was definitely one of the most worth while places they have visited in their travels so far. With the huge stone statues (Moai) and excellent Motocross tracks Toby & Sarena could of stayed a lot longer than their measly 10 days on the tiny island... more

Public Apology
It has been noted that the phrase 'Bloody French' has been used an excessive amount over the past 2 months within this web site. Toby & Sarena would like to publicly apologise to any French national who isn't 'Bloody' as they are sure there must be a few of you out there that this phrase does not apply to.

This time last year...
...we were House hunting in Tauranga, NZ, Car Hunting in Wellington, NZ and Starting Jobs.

Issue 15 5-July-2003, Brisbane, Australia

England cause a storm down under

England's Rugby test tour against the All Blacks and the Wallabies was a huge success. Toby and Sarena where lucky enough to get to the All Blacks game in Wellington, and to get into the spirit of things decided to dress up and torment the grief stricken kiwis with their friends Chewie, John and Jo.


Sore Loser, Sore Winner
After watching England beat the All Blacks Toby was knocked to the Wellington pavement by a disgruntled Kiwi. It wasn't the fact that the next afternoon was spent in A & E that annoyed Toby more the fact that 1 and a half kebabs where lost during the incident... more

Australia Revisited
After 12 months in NZ, Toby and Sarena return to Brisbane, Australia for 2 weeks before visiting some pacific Islands. Thankfully old friends offered to put them up. It was great to meet up with everyone again and thrilling to see some of Damien's new party tricks!!!

Back on the road
Exciting times lie ahead for Toby and Sarena as they prepare to leave the comfort of OZ and slog out a total of 6 weeks in the pacific islands. First stop is Fiji then French Polynesia, then Easter Island. Things don't get any easier after that as they will then find themselves in Santiago, Chile with the unenviable task of finding their own way all the way to New York. They will be forced to travel through countries such as Argentina, Uruguay, Paraguay, Brazil, Bolivia, Peru, Ecuador, Colombia, Venezuela, Panama, Costa Rica, Nicaragua, Honduras, Guatemala, Belize,Mexico and the USA. Its a hard hard life!!!

This time last year...
...we were Chilling in Nimbin, Walking over Sydney Harbour bridge, Flying to New Zealand and Skiing the Remarkables.


Issue 14 7-June-2003, Orewa, New Zealand
Toby & Sarena's Mammoth tour of New Zealand
It has been nearly 12 months since Toby and Sarena arrived in New Zealand. Typically they have left the sightseeing to the very last minute and have spent the last month visiting the major attractions of both the North and South Islands. Below are some of their highlights

Holiday Links


Ken Dodd makes it 'big time' in NZ
Long standing family entertainer, Ken Dodd, has battled through his tax evasion problems in the UK and bought his unique brand of comedy to New Zealand. In a brave move to diversify his act his has ditched his trade mark 'Diddy men' and is solely relying on his ability to make stupid faces. He can currently be found touring the chain of 'Top 10' holiday parks on the South Island... more

This time last year...
...we were sailing the whitsundays, motorbiking through tropical rainforests, driving the outback, mining for opals, befriending spiders, snorkeling in coral reefs, quad biking over giant sand dunes.

Birthday girl reaches new heights
Not wanting to act her age, Sarena braved another birthday by volunteering as the first pilot of the day to fly around a valley on a plank of wood!

Yet another strange Kiwi invention, Fly-By-Wire is basically a plank of wood with a propeller fixed to the back. You are then attached by a wire in a valley and free to fly around at your hearts content...more


Goodbye Katikati
After 9 months Settled in their own house. Toby and Sarena have finally packed up and shipped out. A garage sale managed to get rid of most of the house contents that they had managed to accumulate over the months. The rest was packed into the back of the car. A fond farewell was made to Frida,the landlady. And they where off on the road once again...more


Issue 13 10-April-2003, Katikati, New Zealand

Toby & Sarena's house voted top holiday destination
Katikati resources have been put under strain over the last few months as tourists arrive in droves to stay at the fabled home of Toby and Sarena. There were strong indications that this destination was proving popular towards the end 2002. But no one was prepared for the sudden influx. Their house in Katikati became over booked at one point with tourists resorting to sleeping on the kitchen floor.

It is thought that this advert used in a recent promotional campaign may of had something to do with the increased interest. view video (1,128 kb)

Holiday Links


Luge speed record safe
In a brave attempt to beat the long standing luging top speed record, Joy Spittle bravely launched of down the famous luging track of Rotorua. Unfortunately after several attempts she could not quite beat the current record which as alluded so many over the recent years.

'I think with a pointier bra I would have cracked it. With a technique as good as mine, it just comes down to aerodynamics to achieve the slightest of speed advantages.' more

Newest Zealanders
Its official! as at 3 pm on the 25th of March Jonathon and Joy Spittle became New Zealand's newest residents.

Toby and Sarena where there to great them and show them the ways of Kiwi life, consequently a shed load of alcohol was consumed. Watch the video of our surprise more view video (552 kb)

New Year, New Eyes
After months of deliberating, Sarena has very bravely decided to have laser corrective surgery on her eyes. In typical Sarena fashion her condition was slightly out of the norm, requiring a bit more effort for the procedure. She is now recovering from the operation and we will keep you up to date with her progress... more

This time last year...
...we were driving in very long straight lines, fighting with possums, swimming with dolphins, hanging out with Schumacer, tracking devils, chasing thunderstorms, visiting old school friends and sick relatives.

Issue 12 19-January-2003, Katikati, New Zealand

Beena gets a bike for Christmas.
Sarena finally gets the bike of her dreams which can be conveniently parked on the coffee table! She impressed the local pot plants with a few stunning laps around the lounge. Although she did have a few technical problems when her stiletto's got stuck in the side stand but apart from that she was on top form...........

When interviewed Toby was quoted saying 'She seems to be really enjoying her Christmas present but does seem to be getting under my feet and is causing havoc to the carpet'...more


Wonder Woman!
Sarena had a minute of madness in the last week of employment working at the Rest Home. She found she had some fantastic powers enabling her to change into her work persona at an alarming rate. Strange thing was the resemblance to the TV character 'Wonder Women' but unable to obtain the final look of the super hero she opted for a cross between - Frank spencer and a Dinner Lady...more view video (528 kb)


The Tripout Report is One Year Old.
Can you believe it! 12 months worth of these ridiculous stories. That takes real dedication you know! Remember you can always look at the previous 11 editions via our stories link at the top and bottom of each page.

More lives than a cat.
Throughout their journeys Toby has tried many times to kill off his traveling partner Sarena. Previous attempts include; Attacks by Mongolian Wrestlers, Wild horse rides through the Steppes of Mongolia, Gonorrhea from the Yangtze River, Altitude sickness from trekking to Everest, bush walking with Tiger snakes, drowning in the Whitsunday's, Performance motor biking through slippery rainforests and sleeping with deadly spiders. None of these, however, match up to his latest attempt... ...Throwing her out of a plane at 12,000 feet.

'All I want is the dam travel insurance, but she just refuses to lay down and die'. stated an exasperated Toby. Looks more like Sarena will be making the claim as her Mum is now due to visit them in February and will probably have a few things to discuss with the cold blooded Toby. more

New Years Festival!
New Years Eve was spent sitting in a large field baking in the Hot sun, listening to local and well known bands. Only draw back was the beer tent didn't open until 2pm. The positive side were the half naked women pictured here standing at the front of the crowd. But in typical Kiwi/down under style, they have got the half naked thing upside down. Unfortunately, due to censorship restrictions, they could not be photographed from the waist down. The hired bouncer (pictured in the red t-shirt) was also only half dressed to blend in with the locals but was later dismissed due to lack of physical 'control' which in turn distracted the young ladies from the stage acts... more

This time last year...
...We bought ourselves a camper van'Betty' and with our friends Beau and Clare we became at one with nature and explored some of the more remote parts of of Western and South Australia, from Snakes and Roos on the Bibbulmum Trail to Seals and Possums on Kangaroo Island.

Issue 11 19-December-2002, Katikati, New Zealand

Happy Christmas from NZ
Our second christmas away from home. It certainly doesn't feel christmassy in NZ. Finally the weather is getting better and we have had a great spell of sun and sandflies already.

This is to wish everyone who knows us and to everyone who doesn't! a very happy Xmas and New Year

We have had the best support and the friendliest emails from so many people. This is another Xmas away from our family and friends and we miss them all....

Please keep your emails and messages coming whilst we travel around the world.


Work sweet work!!!

View from Toby's Desk
click and move mouse to pan

Can it get any more exciting! This time the trip'o'vision film crew are let loose in Toby's office, giving you a true insight into this productive industry!

Penelope Pitstop spotted in the Coromandel.
You would think that after all these years Penelope and the 'Ant Hill Mob' would be settled down in some nice quite retirement home. Not the case she has still kept up with the latest fashions and was last seen being chased by the 'Hooded Claw' along Hot Water Beach in the Coromandel. Very Strange!...more view video (88 kb)

It was this big!
A compulsory role of Toby's new job is to go sea fishing when the weather suits... bummer! The fish where certainly biting, and Toby's boss, Phil, was getting very excited by it all....more


America's Cup - hopes dashed
The talk of the town in New Zealand at the moment is obviously the America's Cup (ooh and Lord of the Rings). Thinking she could put in a better show than the GBR Challenge, Sarena enters the competition with her own secret boat design. Unfortunately she has designed her yacht around the fact that she doesn't like the sea, and was instantly disqualified....more




This time last year...
...We had driven across Tibet, trekked up to Everest base camp and raised £1000 for a Kathmandu Orphanage, Travelled across Northern India to end up being very civilised in Goa, raided a pick 'n' mix bar of Singapore and arrived in Sydney... not much then!

Issue 10 31-October-2002, Katikati, New Zealand

Spring is in the air - Competition!
The Weather is getting warmer and more and more ichle lamsies and calvsies are popping out all around us. The whole thing is making us feel very happy and joyful. Plus we have had a complaint that there are not enough photos of sheep on our web site, so we have decided to run a competition...

We have put a lot of lamb and other 'spring' related photos in our latest diaries, but a little black lamb has managed to loose its way. The first one to email us (lostblacksheep@tripout.co.uk) with its location will win free accommodation* staying with us for 1 week in New Zealand. How generous is that!

*cost of transport is not included. You can stay longer but might have to do some washing up.

Home sweet home part II.

View from our home
click and move mouse to pan

We are sorry that we haven't been up to much over the last month and don't have much of interest to put on our web site. Therefore as our Trip'o'vision camera proved so popular in the last edition so we have now put in the 360 degree view from our balcony.

Alien device produces 'Joneser' clones

'It arrived on the distant horizon... a glowing orb. As it rolled down the hill closer to us we could distinguish a human shape curled up in the foetal position within its translucent alien belly. Then it happened, it gave birth to a disgusting slimy clone. If they could clone anyone why did the choose him. Good job I caught it all on video'...more view video (256 kb)

Sarena bids for world 'Extreme Yoga' championship
Sarena will soon be leaving New Zealand to take part in the 'World Extreme Yoga Championships'. Her recent dedication to Yoga and her natural flexibility has turned her into a top athlete in this field within weeks!



This time last year...
...We where travelling through central China by bus and train, taking in the Great Wall, Forbidden City, Terracotta Warriors, Butchered Dogs, and the delightful Yangtze River!!! ...more






Issue 9 9-September-2002, Katikati, New Zealand

The Big Tripout is 1 Year Old.
Can you believe it! A whole year on the road. After leaving the UK on the 10th September 2001 we have decided to take a little break from our backpacks and settling down in New Zealand for a few months before we start our trip back home. To Celebrate 1 year of The Big Tripout we have put our web site through a bit of a face lift (We will of course also be having a few drinks). We hope you like the changes. Please click the About link to find out more.

JP has also posted a Tripout web site with some photos of the lads having a leaving drink with Toby, Oh to reminisce! - http://jp.tripout.co.uk/tripout1.htm.

Home sweet home.
click and move mouse to pan
It doesn't take long! one month in the country and Toby and Sarena have already settled down into a normal routine again. They are determined not to turn into slobs again and spend all their time slouching around in their great new house in Katikati. The lucky beggars have found themselves a great home in the Bay of plenty. It even has 3 bedrooms for when YOU come and visit.

Back to the grind
The final straw! A car a house and now a job. Well Toby has even had two jobs already. The first was out in the fields pruning Kiwi fruit vines for £8 a day so he soon gave that one up and taken a softer IT job in the nearby city of Tauranga. Jammy old Sarena has got a job right next door to the new home. She is working in a rest home looking after all the dear old folk.




Sarena's dark stranger.

'It all happened in a bit of a blur one minute we where sitting at the auction looking at all the nice cars being sold. The next we where the shocked owners of a Isuzu MU'...

What the hell is it? It looks pretty cool but is it any good? Too late now we bid for it and nobody bid higher. doh!


The Big Tripout goes X Rated
Just as a cheap ploy to get more hits, and for a laugh we can now provide the entire Big Tripout web site through the Pornolize engine.

If you are easily offended then don't click this link (bet you do anyway) - XXX rated Big Tripout >






Issue 8 19-July-2002, Wellington, New Zealand

Bye-bye OZ, Hello NZ.
A new month and a new country... New Zealand, the land of the long white cloud. Toby and Sarena arrived in Auckland on July the 1st but wasted no time in getting to the south island and some more scenic parts of the country.

Beena tours 'Welcome to New Zealand.' view video (688 kb)



Crazed monster attacks Auckland.
The North island of New Zealand was placed on red alert after a crazed monster appeared from nowhere and ferociously started attacking anything in its path. An unusually clam eyewitness, Toby Jones, said 'What's the fuss, this is no more scary than the usual crazed monster aggro I get every month!' ..more


Sarena hit's the slope (literally)
For her first experience on the piste, Sarena did remarkable well and was soon bombing down the alpine runs at the Remarkable Ski fields near Queenstown on the South Island of New Zealand. ...more view video (688 kb)


Issue 7 27-June-2002, Sydney, Australia

Bye-bye Betty .
June 12th was a very sad day, As Betty 'the van' was sold off by her miserable owners for a pittance to 4 pretty young English girls. How mean could they be, just using and abusing her then discarding her when she was not needed any more.

'Cool at least I've got some beer money now!' explained the heartless Toby when recently interviewed.... more


Star Trek Musical!
Backpackers Toby & Sarena have successfully auditioned for the new hit musical movie, Star Trek XVII - Spock sings the blues. This film is due to be filmed in Sydney in the coming months.

Sarena and they rest of the cast where delighted with the news. Toby was especially keen as his role as the captain of a fleet of Klingons means that he will not require much makeup...more


Its a small world.
After travelling half way around Australia, Toby and Sarena manage to bump into some friends that Toby, Beau and Clare had met in Tasmania. The coincidence was celebrated by watching England beat Argentina...more



Dirty Damo!
Totally disgusted with England's loss against Brazil. Damien Dolan has taken on a dirty protest.

'I am so disappointed with their performance that I will keep up this protest until I am sober'. ... more


Betty picks up a hitchhiker
An unidentified arachnid joined Toby and Sarena for a lift from Alice Springs to Darwin.

Nobody has been able to identify this species of hairiness so if anybody knows what kind of spider this is then please let us know...more

Issue 6 27-May-2002, Alice Springs, Australia

Sarena's desert birthday.
As an extra special treat for Sarena's 30th birthday Toby arranged for her to be in the remotest part of the Australian desert. - How thoughtful.

The momentous occasion was actually celebrated at Alice Springs with the company of Toby and two friendly neighbouring campers. Van and John... more


Ancient Aborigine tribe discovered.
An extraordinary discovery was made near the sacred Aboriginal land of Uluru. A lone Aborigine from the lost tribe of the wallywalladicks was found wondering aimlessly in the bush.

I local expert in Aboriginal history as issued the following statement. 'Its outstanding to find a living member of the wallywalladick tribe as this odd pale skinned group of indigenous people were thought to have died out centuries ago. If we could understand what this lost chief was saying we may well learn a lot about their culture'.



Beau and Clare wave goodbye.
After 5 months on the road together, the time has come for the Lutrings, Beau and Clare, to part ways with Toby and Sarena. The sad occasion was celebrated with a tasty curry.

We wish Beau and Clare all the best for their last month in Oz... more

Beau and Clare wave goodbye (again).
Two days after already saying our goodbyes, Beau and Clare finally leave us at Daintree national park and drive off in their posh new campervan.

We wish Beau and Clare all the best for their last month in Oz...more



Beau and Clare wave goodbye (just bugger off and take your fridge with you).
Just when we thought we had got rid of the Lutrings they turn up in the middle of the Australian outback.

We waved them good bye and wish Beau and Clare all the best for their last month in Oz and that their posh fridge breaks down!!!...more

On yer bike.
Finally 10 months after Sarena and Toby passed their bike tests, they finally get to ride some.

As a surprise for Sarena's birthday Toby arranged a two day bike ride on top-of-the-range sports bikes through the tropical rainforests of northern Queensland. ....more


Issue 5 28-April-2002, Arlie Beach,Australia

Sarena returns to OZ.
After a spell in the UK to help out with some family problems. Sarena has now returned to OZ. She flew into Brisbane on the 15th of April and was greeted at the airport by her loving boy-fiend Toby and travelling companions Beau and Clare Lutring.... more





'Stud Muffin Joneser' suffers mysterious illness.
After a night on the town during the easter weekend Stud Muffin Joneser was suddenly hit by a mysterious illness.

'I don't know if it was a bug from one of the many girls around me at the bar or the 15 bottles of beer I drunk. But by the morning I was practically paralysed in a state of muzzy dizziness....more view video (1,336 kb)


Love is in the air.
It seems that the spring air in the UK has had a bit of an effect on our friends back home. Not only have most of the married couples we know now have babies but all the nearly all the unmarried couples have decided to go and get themselves engaged.

Congratulations to Joy and Spit and also Steve and Emma on their engagements.

Also congratulations to all the couples who have recently given birth; Tracy and Darren, Leanne and Nigel and Tina and Lee.

Also good luck to John and Vicky who are expecting any minute now!

Its all very scary!!!


'Health Watch' with nurse Clare
Welcome to our slightly more regular than irregular, column full of health tips from our resident nurse, Clare Lutring.

Tip of the week: Excercising on the beach has always been a good way to keep fit. But try a bit of line dancing as its a sure fire way to attract members of the opposite sex... view video (928 kb)

Issue 4 29-March-2002, Bondi Beach, Australia

Sarena returns to UK.
More bad news from home has persuaded Sarena to return to the UK for a few weeks. Speaking from the airport, Sarena quotes; 'It will be hard to be apart from Toby, he is my life, my joy, my love. Probably the greatest person in the world. But I will return to him, oh yes I shall return!'.... more




Base Jumper forgets chute.
Daring base jumper, TJ. Attempted a jump from the Telstra tower in Canberra. But during the hectic race to jump and avoid the officials trying to stop him he completely forgot his parachute.

'If it wasn't for me completely dense noggin I might have been hurt'. Expressed the slightly dazed dare devil as he dusted himself down..... more



Beau auditions for swan lake
The 'Antarctic Ballet Company' didn't know their luck when Beau Lutring auditioned for their 2002/2003 International production of Swan Lake. 'He is a true artiste, we are so lucky to have him onboard'. Claims the shows director, Boris Bolexivic. ... more




'Health Watch' with nurse Clare
Welcome to our new, slightly more regular than irregular, column full of health tips from our resident nurse, Clare Lutring.


Tip of the week: improve your muscle tone and fly like a bird by jumping over beach estuary's. After only years of practice you may be as good as me!... view video (232 kb)

Birdwoman Beena trains circus birds
A new breed of dancing birds are about to hit circus's world-wide thanks to the patience and skills of Sarena Perry. Known in the trade as Birdwoman Beena.... view video (1,120kb)

Issue 3 6-March-2002, Hobart, Australia

Toby celebrates birthday rock climbing.
Not to be outdone by the surfing excursion for Beau's Birthday. Sarena arranges a days Rock Climbing at Mt. Arapiles for Toby's 28th Birthday, Although to cut the cost of the equipment hire she insists that he goes in his birthday suit!.... more



Team 'Betty' fail qualifications for Melbourne's 2002 Grand Prix.
Controversy plagued Formula 1 as new rookies to the race where disqualified from the qualification race at Melbourne after F1 officials insisted that Team ' Betty's car did not meet the class specifications. Team ' Betty' felt cheated as they had already completed 2 laps of the circuit at Albert Park and reached a staggering 40km per hour along the finishing straight, before the decision was made to disqualify them. Team 'Betty' are now looking into sponsorship for next years event.... view video (616 kb)


Tony hawks performs 900 degree aerial.
History was made at the 2002 Globe Skateboarding Championships in Melbourne when Skateboarding legend, Tony Hawks, executed the first ever 900 degrees aerial spin off the half pipe in OZ!.... more

Intrepid travellers swim with wild dolphins and seals
A common dream came true for Toby, Sarena, Beau and Clare after they where fortunate to swim with wild seals and dolphins at Port Philip, Melbourne. 'It was amazing as the seal pups twisted and turned along side us. I was reduced to tears as I lifted my mask to take a whiff of the smelly little buggers!'... more

The 'Beau-Jingles' perform open air concert
A packed crowd of 3 Kookaburra's witnessed the first live performance of the 'Beau-Jingles' at Halls Gap Arena. The atmosphere was electric as the musical pair stormed through their 20 second set on their single guitar... view video (912kb)


'Health Watch' with nurse Clare
Welcome to our new, irregular, column full of health tips from our resident nurse, Clare Lutring.

Tip of the week: Never take a pee when your (supposed) friend is in the vicinity with a video camera! It can seriously damage your health... view video (592 kb)

Issue 2 13-February-2002, Torquay, Australia

Beau celebrates birthday in surf.
Newly wed, Clare Lutring, treated her husband to a days surfing in Torquay to celebrate his birthday.... more

Photo; Beau at 9 months


Midnight raid deprives campers of essential supplies.
Scavenging Possums execute perfectly planned raid on camping supplies of intrepid backpackers on a remote island of the coast of Australia. They didn't even flinch at the security cameras or guards that were intent on stroking them!... more

Darth Vader discovered strumming his stuff at holiday campsite!
'We would of believed it if it was Elvis as he sold us the Spam at the shop down the road, but we never expected Darth Vader to of turned from the dark side to the yellow coats'... more

Issue 1 25-January-2002, Smoky Bay, Australia

Run-down camper van makes 1,200 km journey across the Nullarbor.
'The beating sun dried up our eyeballs as we drove relentlessly for 3 whole days in a straight line through the treeless desert of South Australia'... more




Intrepid backpackers spend 4 days on walkabout in the Bush.
4 adventurous backpackers from England spent 4 days scrambling through the undergrowth of the Valley of the Giants in Western Australia... more




Singing talent discovered.
It seems that the remotest of places can arouse undiscovered talents in anybody. For Beau Lutring it was the summit of Bluff Knoll, Western Australia's highest peak that caused him to break into song... view video (1,338 kb)

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